Why Can't You Look At Me The Same Way?
by Neith S. Ruckus
Summary: Gilbert is in love with his brother, but his brother does not reciprocate... What will happen after a night of drunkeness and folly? Read on! Germancest, human names, Man/Man, Mpreg, Mature... Skip if you hate yaoi...


APH – Why Can't You Look At Me In The Same Way?

A/N: Yoshi minna! Currently I'm hooked on Axis Powers – Hetalia! And I love Ger/Pru very much! So this is inspired by the many Germancest fanfic that I have read! My first APH fic, so forgive me if they are OOC, okay?

P.S. This will alternate between Prussia's POV and Normal POV.'

**Prussia POV**

Normal POV

Warning: Yaoi, M/M smex, Mpreg and use of human names… Not for kiddies unless you're like my friend who started off on yaoi at a young age… I don't own any of the characters, cause if I do, then I'd probably be a voyeur, stalking Gilbert and Ludwig, waiting to catch them in the act…

**I can't believe it! The awesome Prussia , i.e. yours sincerely, actually fell for a guy! What's more is that guy is my own baby brother! How can this be? I know you guys would probably be asking, how do you know you're a homo who is in love with your own brother? Well, let me tell you how I came to that conclusion. As you all know, Germany was preparing for WWII, and we gathered allies. Our allies were Italy and Japan. Somehow, in the midst of planning for the war, Italy and my brother, Ludwig, fell in love with each other.**

**At first, I felt a bit jealous, and I assume that I was jealous because I could never be close my little brother; he always assumed that I would be playing a prank on him and he would just avoid me first before I could even get to him. Then as time pass, I felt myself eying their every move, every kiss and every touch, and I would feel jealousy bubbling up in my chest. Eventually, they had sex and the first time they did it, it was horrible for me. I could hear very clearly Feliciano's screams of "Ludwig! Harder! Faster!" and my brother's groans of pleasure. How I wished I was the one screaming that!**

**But I know that my wish will never come true. It will always be a part of my dreams only. Anyway, the pain finally came to an end. The war ended and the Allied powers decided that Germany should be separated into 2 different territories. I would be part of Russia, and Ludwig would be ruled by Arthur, Alfred and Francis. Leaving Germany was the hardest. I couldn't imagine living without my brother. I felt sad, but I put on a façade, pretending that it didn't matter to me.**

**The years that I spent in Russia, was filled with thoughts of Ludwig. I often wondered if he missed me, or if he was feeling happy that finally, his annoying older brother is out of his life. Upon reaching these thoughts, my mind would be filled with thoughts of him and Feliciano. Then my heart would grow to be as cold as the weather in Russia.**

**Finally, when I was to return to Germany, my heart was literally bursting with joy! I had expected that Ludwig would feel the same, but seeing him after so many years of separation, his face was just blank. I'm back to our house, only to discover that Feliciano had moved in. It seems like while I was gone, they had become closer than ever. At that point I just wished that I did not return back here! But to be able to feel my brother's presence again, I decided to bear with it.**

**Feliciano then suggested, "We should celebrate Gilbert's return! Let's have a party!" So that night, we went to the local bar for a drink. I got myself sloshed within the first hour of reaching there, intending to block out all images of Feliciano and Ludwig being all over each other. Some other people were there too. Alfred, Arthur, Francis, Matthew, Antonio and Romano.**

Ludwig walked around the bar, looking for Gilbert. His brother had disappeared once they reached the bar, and he was wondering where he had gone to. Finally, he found Gilbert slumped at the bar top, murmuring about something. "Oi, Gilbert! Gilbert! Gotts, don't tell me you're already drunk!"

Gilbert heaved himself off the bar top, grinning widely at Ludwig. "West! Come, drink with me!" he slurred. "Oh no! You're not drinking anymore! After all these years, haven't you learn any self control? I'm going to bring you home." Ludwig said. "You never let me do anything! Do you know why I drink so much? Because I, the most awesome Prussia, is in a one-sided love with you!" Then Gilbert crashed their lips together.

Ludwig was shocked, that's the least to say. He pushed Gilbert away, causing him to fall off his chair, rendering him unconscious. Getting over his shock, Ludwig quickly helped his brother up. He carried him bridal style so as to prevent him from puking and went to inform Feliciano that he was going back first.

On the way home, he observed that Gilbert looked quite beautiful when he's asleep. He stopped his tracks, shaking his head to clear his mind. 'How could I think of him this way? He's my brother, I can't think of it like that!'

Reaching their house, he leant Gilbert against the frame of the door, digging out his key and opening the door before he picked him up again and proceed to the bedroom. Gilbert seemed to have regained some of his consciousness, as he began to mumble and sob about something. Ludwig placed Gilbert on the bed and went to the bathroom to wet a small piece of towel. He returned to Gilbert's side, this time being able to hear clearly what Gilbert was mumbling. "Why do you do this to me, Ludwig? Why can't you just look at me the same way you look at Feliciano? Why? Why? Do you know how much it hurts? I missed you, West… I missed you so much…"

Ludwig would definitely describe the next scene as a moment of weakness if you ask him to recall it. He kissed Gilbert, his hands moving over the lean muscular chest, feeling the defined and toned body quiver under his touch. The touches become more frantic, the hands moving to remove the obstructing clothes. "Ludwig…" Gilbert panted, his chest heaving. They were both naked, Ludwig's hands stroking Gilbert's sides as his mouth was sucking, kissing very inch of the pale skin, leaving hickies in its wake.

"Aaahh! More, Ludwig!" Ludwig's mouth moved lower, his tongue peeking out to lick at Gilbert's erection, sending more shivers down Gilbert's body. "Mmmm… Ludwig… Don't tease me…" Gilbert was granted acquiescence as Ludwig took his erection into his mouth. He sucked on the tip, his tongue curling around, moving in a stroking motion. Then he began to move his head, bobbing up and down on the throbbing length.

Gilbert was on the edge of reaching his climax when suddenly the wet heat around his length was gone. He groaned in disappointment and looked at Ludwig, who was rummaging through the drawers looking for something. He turned back to Gilbert with a tube of lubrication in his hand. Reaching the bed, he uncapped it and squeezed out a small amount, spreading it on his fingers. He hoisted Gilbert's legs on to his shoulders and prodded at his entrance with the slicked fingers.

Stretching his hole to the widest for quite some time, Ludwig felt that it was enough and took out his fingers, replacing it with his lubricated erection. Gilbert groaned a bit at the feeling of fullness, which was quickly replaced with a deep moan. Ludwig, on the other hand, was overwhelmed with the tightness and could not resist driving himself into the warm tight heat enveloping him.

His thrusts increased in both speed and force, changing his angle to search for the spot that would render Gilbert into a puddle of bliss. After what seems like hours, Ludwig finally found it, being informed by Gilbert's loud moan of "Oh, West! There, again!". They met each other's thrusts, causing Ludwig's erection to go deeper in, producing more pleasure for the both of them. It was with one final thrust that they both released together, totally exhausted and spent. Ludwig rolled them to their sides, pulling out from Gilbert. He was too tired to think properly and fell asleep. Gilbert just passed out and snuggled close to Ludwig's warm body.

**Ouch! My head hurts like hell! What the fuck happened? That was the first thought in my mind. The next thought? Why is there a warm body next to me? I opened my eyes, only to be presented with a naked muscular chest in front of my eyes. Shocked, I moved away and my eyes took in what was in front of me. A very naked Ludwig, asleep in my bed! And I looked at myself, I was also naked too and covered in cum.**

**My mind is currently running wildly. Did I confessed to Ludwig? Had he accepted? I was so glad, I didn't really think about the answers. I just knew that I had to cherish this moment in case it was a dream. Alas, it was just as I had thought; a dream only. I snuggled up to him, basking in the moment, when suddenly, Ludwig shifted and groaned, "Ugh, Feliciano?" My heart shattered and I immediately pretended to be asleep.**

**I knew that Ludwig had opened his eyes, because I heard a thud followed by an "Ouch!", so I pretended to be awoken by the noise. "Hey West, what are you doing on the ground naked?" I said, rubbing my eyes. "Gilbert! Erm, I'm not sure if you remember what happened last night, but I'm sorry, it was just a moment of folly on my part. I can't reciprocate your love, Gilbert." I just laughed and said, "It's a joke brother and seriously, I don't remember any of the stuff that happened last night, so don't worry about it."**

**Then I told him that he probably should be going to look for Feliciano as I supposed he had not come home last night and would probably be worried about him. So he quickly dressed and left the house. Once I made sure he was out of the house, I began sobbing, crying about my unrequited love. After awhile, I stopped crying and got up, going to the bathroom to clean up myself. Pulling on a pair of dark skinny jeans and a purple shirt, I gave Ivan a call, telling him to meet me at the bar.**

Ivan received a call from Gilbert, asking him out. He was curious as to why Gilbert had asked to meet him, so he went. When he reached the bar, he went about looking for Gilbert, only to find him sitting inebriated at the bar. "Da, Gilbert, how long have you been here to be so drunk?"

"Hic~ You're here Ivan! Come, let's drink! The beer here is very good!"

"Gilbert, you haven't answer my question, da. Just how long have you been here?"

"Eh? I dunno… Maybe a few minutes, a few hours, a few days? Hehe, I really don't know how long I have been here…"

"I think I better get you home…"

"No! Hic~ I don't wanna go home! It hurts so much!"

"Fine, then I'll bring you back to my house, da?"

"Hic… Ok…"

So Ivan hauled Gilbert into his arms and walked out of the bar, hailing for a taxi to bring them home. Once they reached Ivan's house, Ivan paid the driver and carried an unconscious Gilbert out of the cab and began walking to the front door of the huge mansion. He pushed the door open using his shoulder, making his way to one of the many guest rooms. He placed Gilbert onto the big soft bed then made his way to the cupboard, looking for some clothes that he could change Gilbert into.

Meanwhile, Gilbert had regained consciousness, and began to sob incoherently. Ivan quickly made his way over to the bed and cradle him in his arms, cooing softly to calm him down. The few words that he could make out were Ludwig, Feliciano, unrequited love, pain and hurt. Then Gilbert fell asleep again. Ivan sighed, not knowing what happened but was very worried, and began to change Gilbert's clothes. As he walked out of the room, he received a call.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Ivan, have you seen Gilbert?"

"No, I haven't meet up with him yet. What's wrong?"

"Ah, it's just that when I went out this morning, he was still in bed, then in the afternoon when I got home with Feliciano, he wasn't around and he didn't pick up my calls either. It's pretty late now, so I'm worried about him."

"Don't worry Ludwig, I'm sure he'll be fine."

"If you see him, please tell him that I'm looking for him."

"Alright, I will."

"Thank you."

**Oh fuck, my head hurts like hell! Eh? Where am I? Ah, it looks like Ivan's home. What am I doing here? Eh? Where are my clothes? These aren't my clothes? Wah! What happened last night? Shit! I can't remember! Eh? Someone's at the door… Hmm… I wonder who could it be?**

"Da, Gilbert, you're awake." Ivan said as he walked into the room with a tray in his hands. "Ugh, Ivan, why am I in your house?" Gilbert asked, holding his head in his hands. "You said that you didn't want to go home, da. Oh, Ludwig called me last night, enquiring about you, but I didn't tell him that you were with me. What happened between you two?" Ivan asked. Upon hearing Ludwig's name, Gilbert visibly stiffened and lowered his head, not wanting Ivan to see his tears.

Ivan placed the tray on the dressing table and walked over to where Gilbert was sitting. "Gilbert… Please, tell me what happened? Let me help you…" Ivan said as he embraced a silently crying Gilbert. And thus, Gilbert revealed everything to Ivan, all the while sobbing softly. Hearing about his situation, Ivan decided to let him stay for as long as he want.

Thus, for several months, Gilbert stayed at Ivan's place. While he was there he always claimed that he had not appetite and would just stay in his room. Meanwhile, back at Ludwig's house, the German was worried about his brother. 'Where could he have gone? I've asked all the other nations, but they said that have not seen Gilbert too… Gilbert, where are you?' Ludwig muttered to himself.

**I seriously feel like dying, which is totally unawesome. How did the awesome me become like this? Oh, yeah, because my little brother who rejected me… Which is all due to my idiocy to blurt out to him that I love him… seriously, how could I be as unawesome as this? Urgh, I feel dizzy and sick… I gotta go to the toilet now!**

Gilbert ran to the toilet and starts to puke. He had been like this since the second month he had started living at Ivan's. Of course, Ivan didn't know about it, as Gilbert always locked the door to his room and used the adjoining bathroom. Gilbert was getting thinner and thinner as time pass, until one day, he had fainted while he was going to the toilet to puke. It was through coincidence that Ivan had come by his room to ask if he wanted anything. 'Gilbert? Do you want to join us for lunch? I've got some of your favourite food and beer too, da.'

Receiving no reply, Ivan began to pound on the door, 'Gilbert! Are you alright? Answer me, Gilbert!' Worried that something might have happened to Gilbert, Ivan knocked down the door and saw Gilbert lying on the floor, unconscious. 'Gilbert!' he quickly ran over to the limp body and picked him up, rushing out of his house to the local hospital.

Pacing around outside of the examination room, Ivan couldn't help but feel anxious. He had called Ludwig and told him the truth, and currently, Ludwig was on his way to the hospital.

Upon reaching the hospital, Ludwig immediately looked around for Ivan, spotting him pacing about.

'Ivan!' Ludwig ran over and punched Ivan in the stomach. 'How could you lie to me about Gilbert!' Ivan doubled over, not expecting the punch. 'I'm sorry, but Gilbert didn't want to let you know…' Ludwig was still fuming but but his anger under control, 'How is Gilbert now?'

'I don't know… The doctor is still with him; he hasn't come out yet…'

'… So we can only wait here for the news…'

'Yes…'

And so the two of them waited in silence. Finally, the doctor came out of the room and told them, 'The good news is that he is pregnant, the bad news… Mr. Gilbert is severely malnutrition and is in danger of losing the child and his life. We need to put him on an IV and sees how it goes. If he's able to pull through within 24 hours, there's still a chance of keeping the baby.'

Both Ludwig and Ivan were shocked at the news; how could Gilbert be pregnant? It's impossible for a male to get pregnant, much less a nation. And the fact that the unborn child and Gilbert might die was an even bigger shock. As the doctor walked away, Gilbert was wheeled out from the room on the bed and they immediately followed.

For the rest of the day, Ivan and Ludwig took turns watching over Gilbert. It's seems as if Gilbert's will to live was strong, the IVs were quickly being absorbed into his body. And soon, 24 hours has passed, Gilbert had survived.

The doctor did a check up in him and gave him the ok. 'But why hasn't he woke up?' Ludwig asked the doctor. 'Well, it is possible that he suffered stress, hence his body is currently taking this as a form of get away. When he's ready, he will wake up, so don't worry.' With that, the doctor left.

**Urk… What happened? My head feels so heavy and I feel so weak all over… Eh? I'm in a hospital? How did I get here? I was still at Ivan's house the last time I check… This is totally weird… What's this? How the hell have I grown this fat!**

Ivan stirred, hearing some noises coming from the bed. Ludwig and him had stayed over at the hospital, waiting for Gilbert to wake up and they had both fallen asleep. He looked towards the bed and saw Gilbert sitting upright, poking at his stomach. 'Gilbert! You've finally woken up!' Gilbert looked up at him and asked, 'Ivan, how did I get here? What happened? And why am I so fat?'

'Gilbert! Stop doing that! You're with child… That's why you're… Slightly chubby…'

'…'

'…'

'Come again, you say that I'm what?'

'…'

'Come on, tell me!'

'… You're pregnant…'

'…'

'…'

'What the fuck? How can I be pregnant? I'm a guy! A guy for goodness's sake! Do I look in anyway a female? I don't even have the necessary parts to give birth, much less get pregnant?'

It was at this point that Ludwig got woken up, what with Gilbert being so noisy and all. 'Gilbert?' Ludwig said, rubbing his eyes sleepily. Hearing the voice made Gilbert freeze in place. 'Gilbert! You're finally awake! I was so worried about you!' Ludwig hugged Gilbert, feeling relieved that he was finally out of the comatose state. Gilbert, in return, said coldly, 'It's ok, you don't have to be worried about me, after all, Ivan has been looking after me ever since I left your house. Now, please let me go, I suppose Feliciano will be worried about you, you should go back to him…' Ludwig couldn't help but feel sad that Gilbert was treating him like this… "He's not the same as before already… I suppose he hates me now for what I said and did to him…" Ludwig thought to himself as he left the hospital.

**Why the hell is West here? If he couldn't reciprocate my feelings, he should stay away from me, and don't show me too much concern, otherwise he would only be messing with me… Giving me the wrong impression. He should just stick with Feliciano… Ivan filled in the details for me and helped me called the doctor. I asked him why could I get pregnant and he told me that it was probably due to some kind of emotional stress that causes the body to undergo some kind of alteration, thus allowing me to get pregnant…**

**Knowing this, I could easily guess who the father is… I only slept with Ludwig and nobody else, so it only had to be him… But I knew that the child would be unwanted… Ludwig only have eyes for Feliciano, and no one else and I don't want my child to be raised by the pasta loving freak… I could only raise him on my own and probably get a decent job to keep the both of us alive… Thinking about all these makes the awesome me feels sad… The child would never be acknowledged by his father, heck, he may never even know his father… But no matter what, I'll give him all that he needs…**

**I was soon discharged from the hospital once I was deemed fit enough to leave. I left with Ivan back to his home and stayed there for the remainder of the 2 months of my pregnancy. He took good care of me and I was considering if he would like to help me raise the child. Thus one day, I asked him, 'Ivan, would like to help me raise my child once he is born?' Ivan looked surprised that I had asked him about and agreed to it.**

It was near the end of Gilbert's term. Ivan had got him into the hospital 1 month before the due date, in fear of being totally unprepared for the birth of the child. Though he knew that Gilbert didn't want Ludwig to know when he was giving birth, Ivan still called Ludwig to inform him about Gilbert going in to labor.

For the months that Gilbert was staying at Ivan's place, Ludwig seemed listless and was often sleepless at night, his mind filled with thoughts of Gilbert and the child. He had so badly wanted to take care of the both of them and was very disappointed to know that Gilbert had left the hospital with Ivan instead of waiting for him to pick him up. Feliciano had noticed his odd behaviour and told him, 'Ve, Doitsu, you have fallen for Gilbert, haven't you?' Ludwig was shocked. He didn't think that he was expressing it so openly. 'Felic-' 'It's ok Doitsu, I understand… in addition to that, he is with your child, you must go to him…' 'Feliciano…'

Thus back to the scene at the hospital… Gilbert had gone into labor a few hours ago and now Ivan and Ludwig were pacing around, anxious about the happenings inside the delivery room. Ivan tried to reassure Ludwig, but he too, was very nervous about it. It was several hours later when the doctor emerge, congratulating them on welcoming the arrival of a healthy baby boy. Ludwig and Ivan were ecstatic, and went on to ask about Gilbert's condition. The doctor said that other being tired, Gilbert was fine and just needed to rest for a while.

Ludwig could not stop cooing at the baby. He had Gilbert's red eyes and sharp nose, while his hair resembles that of Ludwig's. In fact, Ludwig thought that he was the perfect child. Ivan smiled at the sight of Ludwig cooing at the baby, knowing that Ludwig would make a good father.

Hours later, Gilbert regained consciousness and began to ask about the baby. Ivan was in the room when he woke up, thus answering his questions. The baby was brought to Gilbert and he too, cooed at the baby, marveling at its cuteness. Ludwig spoke up, 'Gilbert, I would like to raise the child with you… After all, he must have a complete family and I insist on it.' Gilbert was surprised at that and reluctantly agreed to it since Ludwig had made it clear.

The baby seemed to have sense the tension in the room and started to cry, startling the rest of the occupants. Gilbert immediate cooed to it, Ludwig rushed over to his side and began to soothe the baby. Feeling the presence of his parents surrounding him, the baby finally calmed down.

**Finally! I'm out of the hospital! It was so boring inside there and the awesome me wa just starting to rot. Speaking of awesome, did I mention how awesome my baby is too? He's just like me, although he also bear some traits belonging to West… I'm really reluctant to go back to West's house, seeing that I have a lot of painful memories there, but nevertheless, I had to go back since Ludwig was going to raise the child with me.**

**I'm really surprised that he wanted the child and was even more surprised that he actually cooed at the baby… On the day of our discharge, Ludwig and Ivan came and helped me packed up and named the baby. We named him Alesk.**

**Baby Alesk seemed to know when Ludwig and I were fight, as he always cry when we started to fight. Thus, we always try to behave ourselves. But still, it doesn't mean that I have forgiven West for the pain he caused me.**

Ludwig knew that, somehow, the baby was helping him…. Whenever Gilbert got into an argument with him, the baby would cry and they would quickly make up to pacify him. He knew that deep down, Gilbert still couldn't forgive him, so he planned something special and within 2 weeks, he was ready to carry out his plan.

He got Ivan to babysit Alesk, and prepared a romantic dinner for two and of course a marriage proposal. So, on that night, he surprised Gilbert with it.

**I totally could not believe my eyes… A sumptuous spread was laid out on the table and the room was only lit by the light of some candles. Ludwig walked out of the kitchen and helped me pulled out the chair, telling me to enjoy this. I was speechless and the awesome me is rarely speechless.**

**We both dug into the meal in silence which was soon disrupted as I remembered about our baby. I asked Ludwig and he said that Ivan had offered to babysit Alesk while we had this dinner. The silence ensued and when it came to the last course of the meal, Ludwig knelt in front of me and took out a ring, proposing to me.**

**He said, 'Gilbert, it was wrong of me to have rejected you because now, I have fallen deeply for you…. What I said in the past doesn't matter now, the important thing is that I believe the rest of my life is meant to be spent with you and baby Alesk. Please marry me, I really love you, Gilbert…'**

**I was so touched by his words and gesture and immediately agree. Though gay marriages were not approved in Germany, we decided to wear the ring as a symbol of our union. Ivan was really happy for us too, saying that we were meant to be together.**

Five years later…

'Daddy! Daddy! Carry me! I wanna fly!'

'Really? Come here, daddy will let you fly!'

'Hahahaha! Mommy, you see! I'm flying, I'm flying! Whoopee!'

'Put him down West! You might hurt him! If he gets hurt, the awesome me is going to kill you!'

'Relax, East, everything will be fine!'

'Papa!'

'Alesk! You're really tall now, da.'

'Yeah! And I'm going to be taller than you and daddy!'

The adults laughed and the kid ran around, chasing after random stuff.


End file.
